I left my heart…in Costa Rica

by Bay on May 6, 2014

blog CR mega zip 14

High on a volcano…it calls to me. ūüėČ

I quit blogging for a little while. ¬†I’m not so sure anyone but my husband really cared or missed my posts. ¬†He’d pull up my site through the little app on his phone and remind me when my last post was. ¬†And I very much could care less.

Just over a month ago we went on an amazing trip to Costa Rica through Marc’s job. ¬†Before the trip, I was a hot mess of nerves. ¬†I couldn’t think about leaving my children for such a long and far trip without feeling physically ill. ¬†To say I was worried would be an understatement. ¬†I made a will, created schedules for Rayna’s school transportation arrangements and bought little Marc a birthday gift to open on his actual 3rd birthday, which was another huge source of guilt and angst: we were going to be gone for his real birthday.

Right before it was time to embark on our trip, little Marc picked up the dreaded stomach bug. ¬†He was a barfing mess less than two days before our flight out. ¬†Add to that my sister’s whole family was down with strep (she was the primary caregiver for my kids, they were staying at her house for 4 of the 6 days), yet I finally had amazing calm. ¬†Everything that I could have done had been done, and we were getting on the plane and I had no other choice.

Our first day, which was mostly traveling, turned out to be horrid, because then big Marc was puking before we even left for the airport. ¬†Since we were flying with Marc’s bosses we had the good fortune of flying first class for both flights, which was a blessing and also a waste. ¬†Blessing because Marc was in close proximity to the bathroom, and also bit of a waste because I was miserable regardless.

Once we arrived in Costa Rica, though, I was smitten. ¬†It was 80 degrees and beautiful. ¬†We took a pretty long bus ride to our hotel while the tour guides filled us in on the country and why it is so great (98% literacy rate = better than the United States is the one they are the most proud of. ¬†My favorite was when she said “all of our produce is organic. ¬†So it is much better than what you have at home.” ¬†Touche)

Marc managed to recover by that evening’s dinner and I managed to not succumb to any illness until our own flight home (hooray!*s*) ¬†But really. ¬†I feel like I could live in Costa Rica. ¬†The beaches were beautiful, the people were friendly, the temperature and surroundings are pretty much like heaven. ¬†I cried when we were driving home through cold and dirty Philly and wished I could just beam our whole family to start a new life ūüėČ

Which leads me to the general funk I’m feeling. ¬†I can’t say I’m depressed, in fact I’m probably happier than I usually am with my life in general, but the blog? ¬†I’m not totally feeling it. ¬†I’m in so many blogging groups and the amount of drive and ambition these women have regarding their blogs is amazing to me. ¬†I just…don’t care? ¬†I mean, sure it’s nice to make money and get cool perks because of your blog but I just can’t justify spending the amount of time and energy away from my family and other pursuits to make it “worth it.”

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m not quitting my blog. ¬†I just am feeling better about it not being such a responsibility. ¬†In my usual form, now that I’ve written this post I’ll probably actually start posting more regularly, but if I don’t, it’s ok.

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